Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Twinky

I can't enough of magenta. For real. I've noticed a very distinct pallette change in my work in the last month or so. It's kind of exciting because it's brighter now. I only want magenta, and orange, and gold, and aqua. No green, I'm over it! I feel the need for more bright, luscious, colors in my pieces at this point. I want colors that are bursting. I'm still loving my red, but it's a brighter, lighter, red now.

The best thing about my habitual depression is that I always can't freaking wait to paint. It's like a really satisfying itch. It's why I'm always hesitant to seek professional (mental) help...I think I'll 'lose' the ability to paint, and think as I do. Which truthfully, is a huge deal for me. But I always go back to that old saying, 'it's about the journey, not the destination', and so then I think about how far I've come, and how bad it could be...and I'm satisfied because I did it FOR myself. And that really makes it all cyclical, and means that I do use my art for the purpose of healing. I found a way when I hadn't another available.

So I think that's cool, and I'm kind of proud that I can channel emotion into things, and make that/them/myself productive. Score one for emotional me! That part of me....'she' is really, really, good to me in that way. She's always taking one for the team, so to speak. I should remember to watch over her more, as she's so sensitive, and shy, and young. Perhaps it was she, who changed my pallette on me then?  Twinky...she's always been so precocious!*



*Twinky was the nickname my mother had for me.

4 comments:

Vag said...

"she"..."twinky" is your inner child. people that that's crap, but its a clear fact and we have spoken about being stuck in a certain time frame (age) b/c of life's cards...

shana said...

well, i've never thought it was crap, myself...but i suppose others do think that's crap.

Vag said...

they're crap.

shana said...

ya know...katie called me twinky once, ODDLY, and it had almost the same effect on me as it did the other time...